Close your eyes, relax and breathe. Life has a lot of ways to throw one off, it could be in a positive way such as having a successful career, or being swamped in a lot of heartache and a bunch of misunderstandings that can piss you off to no end.
I know that I tend to be negative when I write here, for it is the only place I can truly express myself without being judged. No one knows who Lady H is unless she decides to unveil the mystery.
Back to my point, yesterday was the beginning of my 8-day break, a break away from drama, Facebook, Twitter, all means of socializing and focusing on the H, on me. I slept most of the day today and I do not regret it, in fact I feel refreshed, I needed it, so I took it. I watched my beloved sitcom The Big Bang Theory and I could not stop laughing at Sheldon's bird phobia! In this break, I tend to focus on me, do some deep self-cleansing and see where I want to go. I know I never tend to stick to a perfectly detailed plan no matter how "perfect" it is made, so I am going to draw a rough outline to where I want to head later in life.
The future is exciting and full of many adventures I intend to take. Independence, that sweet joyful word that sounds like choir bells to my ears. I love and I cannot wait till I fully grasp it. Traveling and eventually migrating to a place no man has set foot on, at least no one I know has set foot on. Australia, I think of it as home already, basking in the sun's glory, having a permanent tan instead of the continuous sunburns I get by living here. The ocean, waves, sand, sunset with a Pinnacolada or a Cherry Temple with lots and lots of ice. Sun-dresses and flip flops, my hair down and my I-Pod full of Evanescence, Mozart, Debussy, Beethoven, Yanni, and many others. Going to the opera once every other week. Having a bunny with pink eyes who does nothing but eat lettuce and sleep all day. Mr. Fluffy Bugzy, maybe I would get him a Mrs. but I want him and I to enjoy being single and happy having each other to socialize with. It is a fragmented dream, but it's a dream that can be modified to meet my wishes and needs.
As beautiful as the future seems to me, it can wait. I want the present too, I want it exciting. This is, hopefully, my last semester, I hope it flies by. I was expecting a smashing one, however, drama is a bitch I think (Yeah I am back to nagging, suck it up and continue reading or close the bloody tab, no one is forcing you to read anyway.) I am way behind in my school work, not to mention me skipping classes. Bad bad H.
Love, crushes, lust, those tricky stuff that seem to intensify in the animal's mating season and make you almost believe that man was once an ape. Darwin you and your crap! A roller coaster of emotions, wanting to have someone to give it to them, the simple hand-holding, smile, a silent conversation. Laughs and pranks and some jealousy too, maybe a date or two, dancing. Late night conversations and the good morning wake up call. To be honest half of all this is made up, but I like to consider it as wishful thinking, maybe one day. Perhaps. At times one cannot help but feel lonely not because they are surrounded by the always-happy-ever-after couples, but because they experienced such feelings before. She knows what it is like to feel wanted, loved, to feel precious and pretty. They are all good feelings. Having someone to encourage you and to believe in you. God, I used to be happily oblivious, why am I such a curious person who has to try everything to feel satisfied?! Now where on earth am I to have anything like that now?!
Meh, enough nagging, already I am 20 years old not 92 for crying out loud.
Peace out! H!
Happy Easter folks!
Keep smiling: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KagvExF-ijc&ob=av2
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