Between Acceptance and Self-Expression

With every rejection, heartache, disappointment, and failed expectations rise something new in you. It could be hope, resilience, the urge to fight back or it could be defeat, depression, and allowing sadness to swallow you up whole. With every time you choose to be yourself, to be the loud, fun, persona, you will be faced with those who harshly critique you and try to throw you down a big pile of negativity in hopes that you shall not rise. With every time you choose to conform, to abide by what they want, whoever ‘they’ are, you earn acceptance and false pretenses of love, but you lose your very essence. With every time you say no, you get to be isolated and with every yes against theirs you get to see the panic as it rises in their eyes.

Being honest with your self, first, and with others, second, is not as easy as they write. You get to fight lots of fights against conforming, against traditions, against what was already there for no obvious reason. Every time you use your mind, it blows them away, and they will try over and over to tear you down. Don’t kneel, your creation was not made for that.

At times you might want to just say ‘fuck it’ and do whatever they want you to do to gain a few minutes of peace throughout the day, but when midnight strikes, your conscience would not let you sleep it away. The moment you say yes with not that much of a conviction will haunt you forever. The same scene will get played and replayed over and over in your mind with every possible response and comeback that could have been said when you held your tongue from it. You will drive yourself into madness just for a couple of minutes that were not all that great.

Peace of mind comes easily by agreeing on whatever there is to agree. Thinking, on the other hand, is time consuming, tiring and over all hectic. It leads to headaches and sleepless nights, a lot of questioning and self-doubt, but in the end, you reach a conclusion that is just right for you; a conclusion that goes in harmony with your beliefs and ideas. Life was not meant to be dictated upon us, it is meant to be explored. 

Diversity should be celebrated and accepted. I am not obliged to hold your hands as we disagree, but I am obliged to defend your right to say whatever you believe in, even when it is against mine. Acceptance is difficult. What makes it more difficult is that it is hard for two people to allow one another to express their opinions without cutting in. Cutting someone while they talk is not that much of a great thing, you are just reflecting how weak you truly are. You cannot listen and you cannot counter-argue them so yo cut them and ridicule them and purposely hurt them to get them to shut up, because you are weak. Because you chose not to do your homework and research and now you are standing there gaping at what they are saying with no words coming out of your mouth. You disgust me!

Peace Out! H!